Emmetts List explained
by jewelthebrat
Summary: For those who have read Hogwarts meet the Cullens, or just what some laughs. The cullens are at hogwarts and have befriended the golden trio, and their friends too. Together they find a list of things not to do at hogwarts. This is them doing the list.


**I will not start every potions class by asking Professor Snape if today's project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant**

"Hermione." I said walking up beside the book worm.

"Yes Emmett?" She replied

"Would you like some help, carrying your books? they must be heavy." I said.

"Sure Emmett, That very kind of you." She said. but she had a suspicious look in her eye as she handed the books over to me.

"Awesome! now, I'm only going to give these back to you on one condition. If you say no, I will burn these books along with any other books of yours I can find. I already found most of them." I told her.

"But those are library books! And you went through my stuff?" She said, looking at me with a glair.

"Alice and Ginny helped, you know guys can't get upstairs. Now which one should I burn first?" I looked at the title of the book on the top of the pile. "Magical spells and -"

"Whatdo I have to do Emmett?" She asked sighing. I smirked and whispered something in her ear and she gasped and turned bright red.

"No, absolutely not!" She half yelled. We were getting some funny looks for others no.

"Then I guess" I Looked down at the books in my hand again "Advanced potion making, Wizarding laws on mythical creatures, The art of transfiguration and many more are going into the fire." I said.

"You can't burn Library books! Or mine! Its not right!" she cried

"Oops. oh well. my hand will just" I made a show of taking a book in one hand "Slip" and dropping before catching it right before it hit the ground.

"Fine. Ill do it."

"Great! since were going to potions next, and I'm in that class, I carry these the there and keep them until you complete your mission."

"Great" Hermione groaned under her breath.

"Today, we will be making" Snape said to the class, but then I heard a voice talking to me so I stopped listening.

"Psttt Emmett." Hermione whispered

"What?"

"This is it." She said, the reluctantly raised her hand.

"Yes, Mrs Granger?" Snape asked in his boring monotone voice.

"I have a question about today's potions pertaining to its uses."

"It's uses are -" Snape stared to say but Hermione cut him off.

"Besides those uses. Could it be used as...as a sexually lubricated?"

"er...yes. It can"

how the hell does he know that?

* * *

**I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor will I insist that their house colors indicate that they are covered in bees.**

Bellas pov

It was morning and everyone was eating breakfast in the great hall.

"You guys ready?" Emmett asked the twins.

"Ready for what?" I asked him.

"Just watch, my Bella. It's something off of there list." Edwards said from his place next to me.

"Let's go." Fred and George said. All three of them grabbed a spoon and stood up, making there way to the Hufflepuff table.

"What the heck?" I said as I saw the three of them start POKING a different Hufflepuff. Then they took a spoon off there table and poked two at the same time.

"Wait for it..." Alice said. I looked over at the golden trio to see there reactions to this. Hermione was like me, just staring in shock. Harry and Ron were trying to suppress laughter.

"Hey Hufflepuff" I heard Emmett's loud voice ring out, which brought mine, along with any other people's who weren't already watching, attention to him, Fred and George.

When all eyes where on them, and pausing for a second, Fred and George finally spoke.

"Did you guys know that your house colors indicate that you are covered in bees?" There getting good with the talk at the same time thing.

"No they don't" Some Hufflepuff said.

"Yes they do." Emmett replied, moving on to some new Hufflepuff to poke.

"It does not." another one said.

"We insist that it does." Fred and George said. and they continued to poke them. after a few minutes of "No's" and "yes's" the Hufflepuff stopped and continued to eat. Fred, Emmett and George on the other hand, continued down the table the entire breakfast time until they had poked every one of them with a spoon.

dear god, what's next on the list?

* * *

**Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, not even for entertainment purposes**

"Hey, where is Malfoy this morning? Usually he has come to torment and or flirt with someone here." Ron said, the flirting part pertaining to Bella.

"Not sure, oh wait here…oh wow." Hermione said, her voice high pitched at the end. She turned bright red too, same with Bella who looked to the door of the great hall where Malfoy just entered.

Malfoy was also a bright red, trying to sneak his way over to his breakfast table. A certain part of him was…bulging. That certain part being below the waist.

"Hey Malfoy, NICCCEEEE" Rosalie yelled out, as loud as she could so that the most amount of people would look. Malfoy froze allowing everyone to get a good look, and laugh, before he ran out of the Great hall.


End file.
